Look, everyone loves butts. A lot of people are trying to pretend like it's no big deal but the truth is... It is. Today, we cut through all the BS, politically correctness and following traditions just because it is a tradition. Today, we sleep on butts because they make us happy and because they are comforting, round, soft, bootylicious, slappable, squeezable, face buriable and that thing when you wiggle your face around-able.
It is inevitable. Butts are better than rectangles. Soon, everyone will be sleeping on our worldwide patented pillow that (nearly) lives up to the real thing. Today, let's celebrate our love of butts and let all that doesn't matter slip away.
Butts for all,